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3.1: "English" - Page 15-16   |
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MINDFULLNESS january 2006 by Dhyan Vermeulen Dear EQEE net workers, We are living in a global world where we encounter more and more people from different traditions and cultures, in town and in the classroom. Els, a teacher of M- College in Amsterdam, told me that she was struggling with this problem. I try to be mindful but that's extreme difficult. What does it mean to be mindful? How can I practice mindfullness in action? Mindfullness means being particularly aware of your own assumptions, viewpoints and ethnocentric tendencies in entering any unfamiliar situation. Simultaneously, mindfulness means paying attention to the perspectives and interpretative lenses of dissimilar others in viewing an intercultural episode or experience. However, when I encounter dissimilar others, my habitual ways of seeing, feeling and thinking are often thrown into disequilibrium. In encountering people who are cultural dissimilar, or when I am staying in an unfamiliar culture, my identity undergo turmoil. I have to adapt and like to 'be myself'. Emotional vulnerability is part of an inevitable identity change process. It is through non verbal messages that I infer the feelings and attitudes of the stranger in the interaction. Feelings and attitudes are typically interfered through our nonverbal system of kinesis ("movement") encompasses all forms of facial bodily, and gestural movement. If we like to have a good and equal contact or communication with people who are cultural dissimilar we have to be aware of our feelings and body language, and mindful about the message we give. Whatever happens, how you (or I) respond is up to you (or me). In the book EQ, written by Stephanie Vermeulen from South Africa we found good advice: Use will-power to identify the feeling (be aware), understand the message and take action. The list (In the appendix of this book) begins with Emotion: Message for meaning and the appropriate action. It begins with fear based feelings and ends with love based feelings. I did a try out with this list this week. It was a very good experience to be aware of my feelings and gestures in several situations. Made my experience with others more colourful and sometimes painful. There was more fear feeling and more laughter too. Strive to live the ordinary life in a non-ordinary way is an advice of Ralf Blum. That's what this experience is for me. What's your experience? I wish you all a colourful 2006 with best wishes from the board of EQEE, Dhyan Vermeulen 1. Communicating Across Cultures: Stella Ting Toomey, The Guilford press London 1998 2. EQ: Stephanie Vermeulen, Zebra press Cape Town 1999 ISBN 1 86872 331 3 European Network on Emotional Quality © 2002-2008 |